Adultery –“voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband” 

(Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary)

Of late, many Christian women that I either know personally or Christian friends or associates of these women were shattered by the discovery of their husband’s involvement in an extra-marital affair, or multiple affairs.

At some point, a door opened in the marital relationship that led from one thing to the next and now, in some cases after 20-25 years of marriage, the specter of divorce looms menacingly over a covenant relationship that once brought joy and fulfillment to the husband and wife and glory to God.

Many in today’s permissive society consider extramarital sex as acceptable and blameless, however in God’s view, this is not so. His sexual standard for marriage is fidelity, i.e. sexual relations between a man and his wife or a woman and her husband only.

“Thou shalt not commit adultery.”

(Exodus 20:14 – KJV)

“No adultery.”

(Deuteronomy 5:18 – The Message)

 “Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – NLT)

“Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – The Message)

God’s stand on extramarital sex is clear. He makes absolutely no room for sexual relations with anyone other than your spouse and provides no exceptions to His rule.

In light of this, here is TIP #1 to help protect your marriage against adultery.

TIP #1

Understand that you are in covenant relationship bound by God.

Your marriage is not just about your relationship with your spouse. It is a covenant that you made in the presence of others and God that God sanctioned, bound and sealed when you and your spouse made a commitment to each other before Him.

Placing your love for and commitment to God in the marital relationship in a higher place of priority than your love for and commitment to your spouse is a great defense against adultery because in instances where your love for and commitment to your spouse is not strong enough to help you resist sexual temptation, your love for and commitment to God can give you the added strength you need.

When your spouse fails or annoys you in some way and the enemy tempts you to venture outside your marital relationship for solace or revenge, if in a higher place of authority than your love for and commitment to your spouse, your love for and commitment to God in the marital covenant can serve as a buffer and  empower you to realign your thoughts and behavior with His will, thereby protecting your marriage as opposed to making a choice that will damage it.

As a Believing spouse, it is important for you to recognize and understand your personal responsibility and accountability to God in the marital covenant. So often we hear, “if my wife/husband did/didn’t, would/wouldn’t, had/hadn’t, etc. then I would not have engaged in an affair.” Be keenly aware that this reasoning will never stand with God because His stand on marital fidelity  is absolute and will not change according to our situations, wants, needs or desires.

Be not deceived, no matter the circumstances, in God’s eyes you can never justify a decision to get involved in an extra-marital relationship because of something your spouse did or did not do.

If you choose to engage in an affair, you simultaneously choose to violate the marital covenant that you made before God, to violate His Word and holy standard for marriage, and to therefore sin against Him and He will hold you accountable for that. The incident in Genesis chapter 3 concerning satan, Adam, Eve and the forbidden fruit clearly shows that God does not play the blame game.

The prevalence of marital infidelity is sad, disturbing, and extremely grievous to the Holy Spirit of God.

Fellow Christians/Believers in Christ/Kingdom Ambassadors/Saints, by the grace of God, let’s do all we can to protect our marriages and keep them away from the snare of adultery / extramarital affairs and encourage others to do the same all to the honor and glory of God.

Visit again for TIP #2

Peace & Blessings!


Copyright © 2012 by Kim, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “Ring Love Together Forever” by vichie 81 courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net