“When satan wants to destroy us, he places a person in our life.

Likewise, when God wants to bless us, He places a person in our life.”

(Mike Murdock – source unknown)




Who are the people in your life you consider as friends?

Who have you allowed to have access to your personal life, to visit your inner sanctum, your private place of hopes, dreams, deepest thoughts, problems and fears? 

Pause for a moment and think about it.

Do you have these people in mind?

Now here’s the key question………are they really friends?

Don’t answer this quickly and defensively with an unqualified “yes”.

Take some time to really think about it.

Are they really friends?

Here are some factors for you to prayerfully consider in your evaluation:-

  1. Is honoring Jesus Christ a priority in this person’s life?
  2. Does this person encourage me to grow in my relationship with the Lord?
  3. Does this person urge me to do what is right in the eyes of God?
  4. Do I act in a God-honoring way when around this person or do I tend to compromise what I know to be right?
  5. Does this person make me feel more passionate or less passionate about the things of God?
  6. Do I leave this person’s presence feeling closer to God or farther away?
  7. Does contact with this person energize or drain me, bring me up or pull me down?
  8. Are the conversations I have with this person godly, uplifting, wholesome, and purposeful or are they negative, trivial, slanderous and gossipy?
  9. Is there a mutual exchange between us or for the most part, is the person always taking and I always giving?
  10. Are the social/recreational activities I do with this person helping or hurting me?
  11. Does this person have respect for my dreams, goals and values?
  12. Does this person have respect for my spouse, marriage and family?
  13. Is my interaction with this person who is not my spouse sexually pure or is there some form of sexual undercurrent or compromise?
  14. How do I behave around my spouse and family after being with this person, positively or negatively?
  15. Am I sticking with this person out of convenience because I do not believe I can make new friends or do I genuinely want this person’s company?
  16. Is this person subtracting from or adding to my other friendships and/or relationships?
  17. Is this person an enemy or ally of my relationship with the Lord and His purpose, plans and destiny for my life?
  18. Overall, is God pleased with the influence of this person on my life?


So what is the Holy Spirit speaking to your heart about the friends in your life?

Are there some persons who He is telling you to distance yourself from, to no longer confide in, to no longer allow to spend time in your presence or converse with?

As Believers, it is our responsibility to discern the source and motivation of our friendships.

This is extremely important because the friendships we make can make us or break us.

Those we “keep company” with have great influence on our lives either for better or for worse so it is incumbent upon us to with the help of the Holy Spirit qualify the soil of a person’s heart before giving them access to our inner lives as friends.


“He that walks with wise men will be wise: but a companion of fools will be destroyed.”

(Proverbs 13:20 – NKJV)


“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”

(Proverbs 17:17 – NKJV)


“Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”

(Proverbs 27:6 – NKJV)


“Ointment and perfume delight the heart, And the sweetness of a man’s friend gives delight by hearty counsel.”

(Proverbs 27:9 – NKJV)


“As iron sharpens iron; so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.”

(Proverbs 27:17 – KJV)


“A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

(Proverbs 18:24 – NKJV)


“Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”

(1 Corinthians 15:33 – NKJV)





Copyright © 2013 by Kim Sweeting, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Photo/Poster Copyright © 2013 by Kim Sweeting, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.


8 thoughts on “HE’S MY FRIEND!…….SHE’S MY FRIEND!…….REALLY???

  1. This has such wonderful questions! I have been struggling with who is a friend and who isn’t and I know this will clarify it completely.
    Thank you for spelling it out in such a godly manner. I will add you to my follow list for certain. (P.S. the rss posts click doesn’t work, but the sign up does.)

  2. Hi Marsha……I’m happy that the post was such a timely blessing to you……God knows exactly how to meet our every need. Thanks for the follow; I am truly honored; not sure what is happening with the RSS posts click, I’ll have to check it out. I see from your blog that you are new to the WordPress family so welcome and all the best with your new blogging adventure….:)….Shalom!….Kim

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