THE SIN-SATIONAL POWER OF LUST

THE SIN-SATIONAL POWER OF LUST

LUST IS POWERFUL

 LUST IS POWERFUL

LUST – “Intense or unbridled sexual desire” 

(Source – Merriam-Webster Online at www.Merriam-Webster.com)

 

Lust moved from his heart to his head,

Then he played with the thoughts in his mind,

Next he’s acted it out in somebody’s bed

To the plan of the enemy blind.

 

He flirted boldly with the flesh,

He dabbled knowingly in raw sin,

He tasted “sweet” forbidden waters,

And now the claws are in.

 

He got up and covered his tracks,

He built up an inner defense,

He told himself he’d never go back

Removed tell-tale evidence.

 

He said “self now you’ve got to be smart”,

He said “self now you’ve got to be slick”,

He said “self now you’ve got to lie from the start”

If anyone suspects you of this.

 

But what’s unseen is a sinister tie,

His soul with hers has become one,

From this fling he thought he’d easily fly

But it’s much harder to get undone.

 

She wields her power like a sword

And down he goes again,

She uses him like a toy when bored

No love, no care, no pain.

 

She blazes in and out his life

Like a fiery shooting comet,

His self-control lost at her beck and call

He returns like a dog to its vomit.

 

He thinks, what have I done,

I didn’t bargain for all of this,

My wife, my kids, my reputation

It’s all now at high risk.

 

In panic he begs her their “secret” to hide

She smiles and laughs silently with scorn,

Then calls up her friends in them to “confide”

Now the fire of gossip is born.

 

They’re shocked, stunned, amazed and surprised,

Not that upstanding Christian family man,

Snickering “don’t tell anyone” she advised

But they had another plan.

 

He keeps acting like all is cool,

He keeps playing the holy game,

He thinks those around him are obliviously fooled

That’s the sad and absurd shame.

 

For what he does not realize

From compromising with this wench,

Where once emanated fragrant holiness

From his life now comes putrid stench.

 

He once stood spiritually tall,

Now there is much inner distress,

And because of the terror of losing it all

He won’t come clean and confess.

 

His dark draining double life

Progressively takes its toll,

Just like a razor-sharp carving knife

It cuts away at his soul.

 

How will his story end,

Many watch from the sidelines to see,

God wants to heal and mend,

But will he seek help to get free.

 

Will he trust God and tell the truth?

Will he cast aside pride and live?

Will public exposure come from a sleuth?

Will he ask his wife to forgive?

 

One thing that’s certain for sure,

As he chooses to mill about,

God stands lovingly by to restore,

But time is running out.

 

His grace He now extends,

Like a soft gentle breeze it blows,

But once it lifts and ends,

Swift judgment He’ll impose.

 

This too common scene reminds us

To carefully guard our hearts,

Don’t be like a horse with no blinders

Stay focused, reign in lust at the start.

 

SELAH!

Kim

 

“For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies.”

(Matthew 15:19 – NKJV)

“Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life.”

(Proverbs 4:23 – NKJV)

“But every person is tempted when he is drawn away, enticed and baited by his own evil desire (lust, passions). Then the evil desire, when it has conceived, gives birth to sin, and sin, when it is fully matured, brings forth death.”

(James 1:14, 15 – Amplified Bible)

“Beloved, I implore you as aliens and strangers and exiles [in this world] to abstain from the sensual urges (the evil desires, the passions of the flesh, your lower nature) that wage war against the soul.”

(I Peter 2:11 – Amplified Bible)

“The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.

Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

(I Corinthians 7:3-5 – NLT)

 “Let marriage be held in honor (esteemed worthy, precious, of great price, and especially dear) in all things. And thus let the marriage bed be undefiled (kept undishonored); for God will judge and punish the unchaste [all guilty of sexual vice] and adulterous.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – Amplified Bible)

Drink water from your own well—
share your love only with your wife.
Why spill the water of your springs in the streets,
having sex with just anyone?
You should reserve it for yourselves.
Never share it with strangers.

Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts satisfy you always.
May you always be captivated by her love.
Why be captivated, my son, by an immoral woman,
or fondle the breasts of a promiscuous woman?

For the Lord sees clearly what a man does,
examining every path he takes.
An evil man is held captive by his own sins;
they are ropes that catch and hold him.
He will die for lack of self-control;
he will be lost because of his great foolishness.

(Proverbs 5:18-23 – NLT)

For by means of a harlot
A man is reduced to a crust of bread;
And an adulteress will prey upon his precious life.
Can a man take fire to his bosom,
And his clothes not be burned?

(Proverbs 6:26-27 – NKJV)

Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding;
He who does so destroys his own soul.
 Wounds and dishonor he will get,
And his reproach will not be wiped away.

(Proverbs 6:32-33 – NKJV)

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

(I John 1:9 – NKJV)

Confess to one another therefore your faults (your slips, your false steps, your offenses, your sins) and pray [also] for one another, that you may be healed and restored [to a spiritual tone of mind and heart]. The earnest (heartfelt, continued) prayer of a righteous man makes tremendous power available [dynamic in its working].

 (James 5:16 – Amplified Bible)

 

Copyright © 2013 by Kim Sweeting, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “Burning Heart” by Digitalart courtesy of http://www.FreeDigitalPhotos.net
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A MAN’S MAJOR NEED & THE NUMBER ONE NEED FOR A WOMAN – DR. MYLES MUNROE

A MAN’S MAJOR NEED & THE NUMBER ONE NEED FOR A WOMAN – DR. MYLES MUNROE

"LET'S MEET EACH OTHER'S NEEDS"

“LET’S MEET EACH OTHER’S NEEDS”

Do you want or need to improve the quality of your marriage?

I just came across these video clips by Dr. Myles Munroe that contain two simple yet powerful wisdom keys for husbands and wives.

I believe if practiced, these two keys would greatly improve and in many instances save marriages both within and outside of the Body of Christ.

Listen and be blessed.

A Man’s Major Need

The Number One Need for a Woman

Husbands, your wife needs affection and wives, your husband needs respect.

If your marriage is important to you, I urge you to do and not just hear this wisdom.

Be encouraged!

Kim

Copyright © 2013 by Kim Sweeting, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “Connecting Hearts” by digitalart ofhttp://www.FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Video “A Man’s Major Need is Respect” by Dr. Myles Munroe courtesy of TheMarriageSnippet – http://www.youtube.com

Video “The Number One Need for a Woman” by Dr. Myles Munroe courtesy of TheMarriageSnippet – http://www.youtube.com

ANOTHER CASUALTY

ANOTHER CASUALTY

"BEWARE OF THE ENEMY"

“BEWARE OF THE ENEMY”

 

enticing visual delight

calculatingly stealthily crossing boundaries

stolen waters sweet?

 

lies, deceit, trust crushed, 

drenching tears, lost years, confusion, fears,

another casualty of infidelity. 

 

“Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion roaring [in fierce hunger], seeking someone to seize upon and devour.”

(I Peter 5:8 – Amplified Bible)

 

“So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.”

(I Corinthians 10:12, 13 – NIV, 1984)

 

DON’T BE A CASUALTY…..TAKE THE WAY OF ESCAPE! 

SELAH!

Kim

 

Copyright © 2012 by Kim, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “Couple in Love Having Breakup” by smarnad, courtesy of digitalart/FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

BEFORE YOU CHEAT………THINK! (PART 2)

BEFORE YOU CHEAT……..THINK! (PART 2)

BEFORE YOU CHEAT......THINK!!

“BEFORE YOU CHEAT…..THINK!”

 

I originally wrote this post on May 18, 2010 and feel the need to re-post it in light of the high incidence of marital infidelity in the Body of Christ.

As you read, my prayer is that you would be encouraged to decide anew to by God’s grace tenaciously guard the covenant that you made with your spouse before the Lord at the altar on your wedding day.

Remember, we will each give an account to Him re: our marriages one day.

SELAH!

Kim

 Adultery –“voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband” – (Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary)
Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

 “For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

(2 Corinthians 10:3-5 – NIV)

When faced with the prospect of an adulterous relationship, the first, best and most powerful line of defense we have is in our minds. Whatever we focus on in our mind becomes magnified in our life; what we behold, we become.

If we take our minds off of what the Word of God says about adultery and focus our thoughts on what we believe would be the pleasurable aspects of an extramarital relationship, then we automatically increase the likelihood that we will commit the sin of adultery.

Conversely, if we set our minds on what the Word of God has to say about adultery and our thoughts on the damaging aspects of an extramarital relationship, then we automatically decrease the likelihood that we will commit the sin of adultery.

So rather than entertaining thoughts that will draw us toward committing this sin, we need to instead focus our thoughts on what will draw us toward God and away from committing it, to focus them on how the Word condemns such a relationship, on the responsibility that we have to God when it comes to our blood bought bodies, and on the certain damage that such a relationship would bring.

Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

Do not entertain thoughts that will feed and strengthen your fleshly nature and thereby increase the likelihood that you will engage in an adulterous relationship.

Do not think about the potential pleasure, the thrill of the newness, the enticing challenge of the sexual conquest, what the person may do sexually that your spouse will not or can not do, the excitement of the secret lunches, dinners, and trips or as Bahamians say, the “ghost moves”, the potential money and material goods you may gain, the adoration and encouragement you may receive that your spouse has not given you, the companionship and conversation you may enjoy that has not been forthcoming from your spouse, etc.

Instead, set your mind on what the Word of God says and on thoughts that will kill your fleshly nature, strengthen your spirit man and increase your propensity to remain faithful to your spouse.

 Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

Think about the spiritual price you will pay.

Think about the damage to your relationship and fellowship with God.

Think about what God says in the Word about committing adultery.

Think about what He says is the fate of those who practice adultery, that they shall not inherit His Kingdom and will be judged by Him.

Think about how you would be breaking a covenant and vow you made before God – do not be deceived, it’s not just about you and your spouse, it never has been and never will be.

Think about how having sex outside your marriage is taking the temple of the Holy Spirit (your body) and defiling it.

Think about how much it will grieve the Holy Spirit, the One who has always been with you and in you to help you in your walk with Christ.

Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

Think about the guilt and shame and the heavy weight of conviction in the depths of your soul.

Think about the negative effect on the Body of Christ, the church.

Think about the reproach it will bring to the name of Jesus Christ which you bear as His child.

Think about the door of lies and deceit that it will open in your life and God desires truth in your innermost parts.

Think about how absolutely nothing is hidden from God so the affair will not be a secret –  He will see you and the individual wherever you are and whatever you are doing and He can communicate it to whomever, whenever He chooses.

Think about the foothold you will give the enemy, the ammunition to accuse and torment you over and over and over in your mind, bringing what you did to your remembrance even when you want to forget it and move on.

Think about the enemy laughing at you for his victory in this area of your life.

Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

Think about the cutting pain and damage it will cause your spouse – mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically and socially.

Think about the cutting pain and damage it will cause your children – mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically and socially.

Think about the cutting pain and damage it will cause you – mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically and socially.

Think about the irreversible damage to your marriage and your family – things will never be the same.

Think about how it may lead to divorce – Do you really want to lose your wife/husband, your children? Is that what you really want?

Think about courts, lawyers, alimony, child support, child visitation.

Think about another man or woman raising your children, the children God has entrusted to you.

Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

Think about the fact that God says you are sinning against your own body.

Think about the sexually transmitted diseases you may contract, Chlamydia, Trichomoniasis, Gonorrhea, and Syphilis, Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV-2), Genital Herpes, Human Papillomavirus (HPV), Hepatitis B, and Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV).

Think about passing on this sexually transmitted disease to your spouse.

Think about suffering and dying from the sexually transmitted disease or related complications.

Think about your spouse suffering and dying from the sexually transmitted disease or related complications.

Think about your children becoming orphans all because of your selfish desire for sexual gratification.

 Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

Think about the potential demonic infiltration into your body – once you have sexual relations, whatever spirits dwell in that person  can now enter you.

Think of the soul ties you will form with that person, that they would become a part of you – sex makes two one.

Think about unplanned pregnancy.

Think about having to tell your wife/husband and children and extended family about it – even worse, think about becoming a murderer through abortion.

Think about the misuse of money that God has entrusted you to be a good steward of – money once used to honorably take care of your family, finance the Kingdom and help others, now being used to finance sin.

Think about the stress, strain and pressure of living a double life, with the ever-present fear of being found out.

Think about how difficult it may be to sever the relationship when you want it to end – there is no guarantee that you can get out of it as easily as you got in?

What if the other person does not want to end the relationship and threatens to expose it if you leave them?

What if they threaten to end your life or the life of your spouse if you leave them? – Far fetched? – Just listen to the news anywhere.

Think about the possibility of dying in that life of sin without having a chance to repent.

Think about losing out on completing your God-given life purpose or assignment.

Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

All of this for a 3-8 second orgasm?

All of this for a few hours of companionship?

All of this for material goods that you can not even take with you into eternity?

AN EXTRAMARITAL/ADULTEROUS RELATIONSHIP IS COSTLY!

Are you willing to pay the price spiritually, mentally, physically, emotionally, socially, financially?

Man of God, Woman of God, before you commit adultery, THINK!

Shalom!

Kim

Copyright © 2012 by Kim, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “TEAM SOLITARY” by Idea Go courtesy of  www.FreeDigitalPhotos.net

BEFORE YOU CHEAT……..THINK! (PART 1)

BEFORE YOU CHEAT……..THINK! (PART 1)

BEFORE YOU CHEAT.........THINK

“BEFORE YOU CHEAT……….THINK!”

I originally wrote this post on May 18, 2010 and feel the need to re-post it in light of the high incidence of marital infidelity in the Body of Christ.

As you read, my prayer is that you would be encouraged to decide anew to by God’s grace tenaciously guard the covenant that you made with your spouse before the Lord at the altar on your wedding day.

Remember, we will each give an account to Him re: our marriages one day.

SELAH!

Kim

 Adultery –“voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband” 

(Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary)

Man of God, Woman of God, before you cheat, THINK!

Many in today’s permissive society consider extramarital sex acceptable and blameless, however in the Kingdom of God the sexual standard of marriage is fidelity, i.e. sexual relations between a man and his wife or a woman and her husband only.

 “Thou shalt not commit adultery.”

(Exodus 20:14 – KJV)

“No adultery.”

(Deuteronomy 5:18 – The Message)

 ”Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – NLT)

“Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – The Message)

  Man of God, Woman of God, before you cheat, THINK!

God’s standard about extramarital sex is clear. He makes absolutely no room for sexual relations with anyone other than your spouse and provides no exceptions to His rule.

So often we hear, “if my wife/husband did/didn’t, would/wouldn’t, had/hadn’t, etc. then I would not have engaged in an affair.” There will undoubtedly be times of strained relations between you and your spouse within your marriage for one reason or another however God’s standards are absolute and do not change according to our situations, needs or desires.

“Then Jesus said to His disciples, If anyone desires to be My disciple, let him deny himself [disregard, lose sight of, and forget himself and his own interests] and take up his cross and follow Me [cleave steadfastly to Me, conform wholly to My example in living and, if need be, in dying, also].”

(Matthew 16:24 – Amplified Bible)

God does not permit, or say it is okay for us to us to engage in extramarital sex if our spouses do not meet some standard or expectation that we have in some area of our marriage. Instead, as in every other challenging situation, He tells us to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Jesus Christ (the Word), even if that means no sex.

Man of God, Woman of God, before you cheat, THINK!

You may say, oh but the temptation is too great. I can not help myself. Don’t you see all the fine-looking fellows and sexy looking ladies all around? Everywhere I turn some body is calling out to me. How can anyone stand up to that kind of temptation after all, we are only human? Surely God does not expect us to stay faithful to our spouse with all the other tempting delights He created all around us!

 “The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.”

(I Corinthians 10:13 – NLT)

“For no temptation (no trial regarded as enticing to sin), [no matter how it comes or where it leads] has overtaken you and laid hold on you that is not common to man [that is, no temptation or trial has come to you that is beyond human resistance and that is not adjusted and adapted and belonging to human experience, and such as man can bear]. But God is faithful [to His Word and to His compassionate nature], and He [can be trusted] not to let you be tempted and tried and assayed beyond your ability and strength of resistance and power to endure, but with the temptation He will [always] also provide the way out (the means of escape to a landing place), that you may be capable and strong and powerful to bear up under it patiently.”

(I Corinthians 10:13 – Amplified Bible)

After reading this scripture, it is clear that as far as God is concerned, temptation is no excuse for infidelity. He said that He will not allow any temptation to be more than we can stand and when tempted, He will always show us a way of escape.

So in light of this verse, we are not really being truthful when we say “I could not help myself” or “it just happened”, it would be more accurate to say “I could have helped myself but I chose not to” or “I saw the way of escape but I chose not to take it” – like one of my former pastors used to say, “It’s tight, but it’s right”.

 Man of God, Woman of God, before you cheat, THINK!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                   ……………to be continued

Copyright © 2012 by Kim, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “TEAM SOLITARY” by Idea Go courtesy of  www.FreeDigitalPhotos.net

“DRESSED TO SEDUCE”

“DRESSED TO SEDUCE”

 

“BEWARE OF SEDUCTION”

 

“Dear friend, do what I tell you; treasure my careful instructions.


Do what I say and you’ll live well.

My teaching is as precious as your eyesight—guard it!

Write it out on the back of your hands; etch it on the chambers of your heart.


Talk to Wisdom as to a sister.

Treat Insight as your companion.


They’ll be with you to fend off the Temptress—that smooth-talking, honey-tongued Seductress.

 

As I stood at the window of my house looking out through the shutters,


Watching the mindless crowd stroll by,

I spotted a young man without any sense
.

Arriving at the corner of the street where she lived,

then turning up the path to her house.


It was dusk, the evening coming on ,
the darkness thickening into night.


Just then, a woman met him—she’d been lying in wait for him, dressed to seduce him.


Brazen and brash she was, restless and roaming, never at home,


Walking the streets, loitering in the mall, hanging out at every corner in town.

 

She threw her arms around him and kissed him, boldly took his arm and said,
“I’ve got all the makings for a feast—today I made my offerings, my vows are all paid,


So now I’ve come to find you, hoping to catch sight of your face—and here you are!


I’ve spread fresh, clean sheets on my bed, colorful imported linens.


My bed is aromatic with spices
and exotic fragrances.


Come, let’s make love all night,
spend the night in ecstatic lovemaking!


My husband’s not home; he’s away on business,
and he won’t be back for a month.”

 

Soon she has him eating out of her hand, bewitched by her honeyed speech.

Before you know it, he’s trotting behind her, like a calf led to the butcher shop,

Like a stag lured into ambush and then shot with an arrow,

Like a bird flying into a net
 not knowing that its flying life is over.

 

So, friends, listen to me, take these words of mine most seriously.

Don’t fool around with a woman like that;

don’t even stroll through her neighborhood.

Countless victims come under her spell;


she’s the death of many a poor man.


She runs a halfway house to hell,


fits you out with a shroud and a coffin.”

(Proverbs 7 – The Message Bible)

SELAH!

Photo courtesy of “Bowl Reflections” by Carlos Porto/www.freedigitalphotos.net

TEN TIPS TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE AGAINST ADULTERY / EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS – (TIP #9)

10 TIPS TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE AGAINST

ADULTERY / EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS – (TIP #9)

“TOGETHER FOREVER”

Adultery –“voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband” 

(Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary)

Of late, many Christian women that I either know personally or Christian friends or associates of these women were shattered by the discovery of their husband’s involvement in an extra-marital affair, or multiple affairs.

At some point, a door opened in the marital relationship that led from one thing to the next and now, in some cases after 20-25 years of marriage, the specter of divorce looms menacingly over a covenant relationship that once brought joy and fulfillment to the husband and wife and glory to God.

Many in today’s permissive society consider extramarital sex as acceptable and blameless, however in God’s view, this is not so. His sexual standard for marriage is fidelity, i.e. sexual relations between a man and his wife or a woman and her husband only.

“Thou shalt not commit adultery.”

(Exodus 20:14 – KJV)

“No adultery.”

(Deuteronomy 5:18 – The Message)

 Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – NLT)

“Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – The Message)

God’s stand on extramarital sex is clear. He makes absolutely no room for sexual relations with anyone other than your spouse and provides no exceptions to His rule.

In light of this, here is TIP #9 to help protect your marriage against adultery.

TIP #9

Believe that you are able to resist sexual temptation.

Believing that you are able to resist sexual temptation is an important strategy to help protect your marriage against adultery.

If you choose to believe statements like,

  • “Sexual temptation is too great for me to resist”
  • “I cannot help myself if I tempted sexually”
  • “I’m only human so I will fall sexually at some point”
  • “God does not really expect me to stay faithful to my spouse with all the other tempting delights He created all around me” etc

you will automatically make yourself more prone to involvement in an affair.

This is why it is important to instead believe the Word of God.

“The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.”

(I Corinthians 10:13 – NLT)

“For no temptation (no trial regarded as enticing to sin), [no matter how it comes or where it leads] has overtaken you and laid hold on you that is not common to man [that is, no temptation or trial has come to you that is beyond human resistance and that is not adjusted and adapted and belonging to human experience, and such as man can bear]. But God is faithful [to His Word and to His compassionate nature], and He [can be trusted] not to let you be tempted and tried and assayed beyond your ability and strength of resistance and power to endure, but with the temptation He will [always] also provide the way out (the means of escape to a landing place), that you may be capable and strong and powerful to bear up under it patiently.”

(I Corinthians 10:13 – Amplified Bible)

After reading this scripture, it is clear that as far as God is concerned, temptation is no excuse for infidelity.

He said that He will not allow any temptation to be more than we can stand and when tempted, He will always show us a way of escape.

So in light of this verse, we are not really being truthful when we say “I could not help myself” or “it just happened”.

It would be more accurate to say “I could have helped myself but I chose not to” or “I saw the way of escape but I chose not to take it” – like one of my former pastors used to say, “It’s tight, but it’s right”.

So who are you going to choose to believe when it comes to your ability to resist sexual temptation, the Word of God or your flesh?

 Believing that you are able to resist sexual temptation is an important strategy to help protect your marriage against adultery.

The prevalence of marital infidelity is sad, disturbing, and extremely grievous to the Holy Spirit of God.

Fellow Christians/Believers in Christ/Kingdom Ambassadors/Saints, by the grace of God, let’s do all we can to protect our marriages and keep them away from the snare of adultery / extramarital affairs and encourage others to do the same all to the honor and glory of God.

Visit again for TIP #10.

Peace & Blessings!

Kim

Copyright © 2012 by Kim, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “MAN AND WOMAN AT SUNSET” by Kongsky courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

 

TEN TIPS TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE AGAINST ADULTERY / EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS – (TIP #8)

10 TIPS TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE AGAINST

ADULTERY / EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS – (TIP #8)

“TOGETHER FOREVER”

Adultery –“voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband” 

(Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary)

Of late, many Christian women that I either know personally or Christian friends or associates of these women were shattered by the discovery of their husband’s involvement in an extra-marital affair, or multiple affairs.

At some point, a door opened in the marital relationship that led from one thing to the next and now, in some cases after 20-25 years of marriage, the specter of divorce looms menacingly over a covenant relationship that once brought joy and fulfillment to the husband and wife and glory to God.

Many in today’s permissive society consider extramarital sex as acceptable and blameless, however in God’s view, this is not so. His sexual standard for marriage is fidelity, i.e. sexual relations between a man and his wife or a woman and her husband only.

“Thou shalt not commit adultery.”

(Exodus 20:14 – KJV)

“No adultery.”

(Deuteronomy 5:18 – The Message)

 Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – NLT)

“Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – The Message)

God’s stand on extramarital sex is clear. He makes absolutely no room for sexual relations with anyone other than your spouse and provides no exceptions to His rule.

In light of this, here is TIP #8 to help protect your marriage against adultery.

TIP #8

Guard Your Thought Life

 No one suddenly decides to have an extramarital affair.

A spouse who commits adultery has been unfaithful in his or her heart and mind long before he or she begins an affair.

All adultery begins in the mind with a thought so this is why guarding your thought life is an important strategy to help protect your marriage against adultery.

Entertaining, nurturing and or meditating on lustful thoughts about someone other than your spouse or on the prospect of an affair will increase the likelihood that you engage in an adulterous relationship.

Instead, cast those thoughts down and focus your mind on what the Word of God says about marriage and adultery and on thoughts that will kill lustful desires, strengthen your spirit man and increase your propensity to remain faithful to your spouse.

“The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

(II Corinthians 10:4, 5 – NIV, 1984)

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” 

(Philippians 4:8 – NIV, 1984)

When faced with the prospect of an adulterous relationship, the first, best and most powerful line of defense you have is in your mind.

If you take your mind off of what the Word of God says about adultery and focus your thoughts on what you believe would be the pleasurable aspects of an extramarital relationship, then you will automatically increase the likelihood that you will cheat on your spouse.

Conversely, if you set your mind on what the Word of God has to say about adultery and your thoughts on the damaging aspects of an extramarital relationship, then you automatically decrease the likelihood that you will cheat on your spouse.

So rather than focusing on thoughts that will draw you toward committing this sin, instead focus your thoughts on what will draw you toward God and away from committing it.

Focus them on how the Word condemns such a relationship, on God’s love for you and Christ’s sacrifice on the cross for you, on the responsibility that you have to God when it comes to your blood bought body, and on the inevitable damage that such a relationship would bring to you, your spouse, your natural and spiritual family and most of all, your relationship with God.

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” 

(Proverbs 4:23 – NIV).

Remember, nobody wakes up one day and suddenly decides to have an extramarital affair.

Whatever you focus on in your mind becomes magnified in your life; what you behold, you become.

All adultery begins in the mind so help protect your marriage against adultery by vigilantly guarding your thought life.

The prevalence of marital infidelity is sad, disturbing, and extremely grievous to the Holy Spirit of God.

Fellow Christians/Believers in Christ/Kingdom Ambassadors/Saints, by the grace of God, let’s do all we can to protect our marriages and keep them away from the snare of adultery / extramarital affairs and encourage others to do the same all to the honor and glory of God.

Visit again for TIP #9.

Peace & Blessings!

Kim

Copyright © 2012 by Kim, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “Romantic Couple” by Digitalart courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

10 TIPS TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE AGAINST ADULTERY / EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS – (TIP#6)

10 TIPS TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE AGAINST

ADULTERY / EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS – (TIP #6)

“TOGETHER FOREVER”

Adultery –“voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband” 

(Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary)

Of late, many Christian women that I either know personally or Christian friends or associates of these women were shattered by the discovery of their husband’s involvement in an extra-marital affair, or multiple affairs.

At some point, a door opened in the marital relationship that led from one thing to the next and now, in some cases after 20-25 years of marriage, the specter of divorce looms menacingly over a covenant relationship that once brought joy and fulfillment to the husband and wife and glory to God.

Many in today’s permissive society consider extramarital sex as acceptable and blameless, however in God’s view, this is not so. His sexual standard for marriage is fidelity, i.e. sexual relations between a man and his wife or a woman and her husband only.

“Thou shalt not commit adultery.”

(Exodus 20:14 – KJV)

“No adultery.”

(Deuteronomy 5:18 – The Message)

 Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – NLT)

“Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – The Message)

God’s stand on extramarital sex is clear. He makes absolutely no room for sexual relations with anyone other than your spouse and provides no exceptions to His rule.

In light of this, here is TIP #6 to help protect your marriage against adultery.

TIP #6

Monitor your interaction with the opposite sex and keep appropriate boundaries.

As a married person, it is important for you to monitor your interaction with members of the opposite sex and keep appropriate boundaries. 

Don’t flirt and don’t encourage others who flirt with you. Avoid inappropriate eye contact and avoid making comments about personal aspects of an individual such as their hair, skin, shape, scent, muscles, chest etc. that may be interpreted sexually. Flirting communicates availability and as a married person, you are no longer available to anyone but your spouse.

Stay away from sex talk, sexually laced email, texts, and websites. Avoid casual touching. Avoid private coffee breaks, lunches and/or dinners, and in as much as possible, traveling alone with members of the opposite sex. Don’t share details of your marriage relationship, particularly problems with a member of the opposite sex.

Beware of leaning on or looking to members of the opposite sex for ego-boosts, self-esteem boosts, sexual-esteem boosts, appreciation, tenderness, value and/or respect. Do not do anything with or say anything to someone of the opposite sex that you would not do or say in the presence of your spouse or be comfortable telling your spouse about.

If you feel sexually attracted to someone who you have to come into regular contact with, do not act on even reveal the attraction to him/her. If you are tempted to stray, if not your spouse, find a Spirit-filled Believer that upholds the covenant of marriage who you can confide in and who can pray with, advise, guide and be a source of accountability for you so that you can work through and not yield to the temptation.

Ask the Holy Spirit for wisdom in all your interaction with members of the opposite sex. Ask Him to help you discern even the subtlest trap of the enemy that could lead you down the dark path of sexual sin.

In as much as possible stay away from anyone or anything that can lead relationships beyond platonic boundaries.

Monitoring your interaction with members of the opposite sex and keeping appropriate boundaries will help protect your marriage against adultery/extra marital affairs.

The prevalence of marital infidelity is sad, disturbing, and extremely grievous to the Holy Spirit of God.

Fellow Christians/Believers in Christ/Kingdom Ambassadors/Saints, by the grace of God, let’s do all we can to protect our marriages and keep them away from the snare of adultery / extramarital affairs and encourage others to do the same all to the honor and glory of God.

Visit again for TIP #7

Peace & Blessings!

Kim

Copyright © 2012 by Kim, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “Rings on Rose Petals” by Jomphong courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

10 TIPS TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE AGAINST ADULTERY / EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS – (TIP #3)

10 TIPS TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE AGAINST

ADULTERY / EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS – (TIP #3)

“TOGETHER FOREVER”

Adultery –“voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband” 

(Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary)

Of late, many Christian women that I either know personally or Christian friends or associates of these women were shattered by the discovery of their husband’s involvement in an extra-marital affair, or multiple affairs.

At some point, a door opened in the marital relationship that led from one thing to the next and now, in some cases after 20-25 years of marriage, the specter of divorce looms menacingly over a covenant relationship that once brought joy and fulfillment to the husband and wife and glory to God.

Many in today’s permissive society consider extramarital sex as acceptable and blameless, however in God’s view, this is not so. His sexual standard for marriage is fidelity, i.e. sexual relations between a man and his wife or a woman and her husband only.

“Thou shalt not commit adultery.”

(Exodus 20:14 – KJV)

“No adultery.”

(Deuteronomy 5:18 – The Message)

 Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – NLT)

“Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.”

(Hebrews 13:4 – The Message)

God’s stand on extramarital sex is clear. He makes absolutely no room for sexual relations with anyone other than your spouse and provides no exceptions to His rule.

In light of this, here is TIP #3 to help protect your marriage against adultery.

TIP #3

Keep the sex alive and fulfilling.

Keeping the sexual relationship between you and your spouse alive and fulfilling is a strong deterrent to adultery. The Word of God addresses this issue in I Corinthians 7:1-5.

“Now, getting down to the questions you asked in your letter to me. First, Is it a good thing to have sexual relations? Certainly—but only within a certain context. It’s good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder. The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to “stand up for your rights.” Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. Abstaining from sex is permissible for a period of time if you both agree to it, and if it’s for the purposes of prayer and fasting—but only for such times. Then come back together again. Satan has an ingenious way of tempting us when we least expect it. I’m not, understand, commanding these periods of abstinence—only providing my best counsel if you should choose them.” – (The Message Bible)

Generally speaking, the stronger the relationship between you and your spouse as a whole, the better your chances of a satisfying sex life and subsequently, of avoiding adultery.

As such, date your spouse. Keep the romance alive. Compliment and encourage him/her. Show him/her appreciation and support. Keep emotionally connected to your spouse through meaningful, intimate conversation. Spend quality time doing enjoyable things together. Seek to minimize and/or quickly resolve conflicts; agree  to disagree if you have to. Be openly affectionate through hugs, touches and kisses. Tell your spouse “I love you” and mean it.

Make every effort to be healthy and as physically attractive and desirable to your spouse as possible.

Be wary of falling into the rut of familiarity and “letting yourself go” by neglecting to maintain good grooming and hygiene, dressing any old kind of way at home and/or when going out, gaining excessive weight, no longer caring how your conduct or physical appearance affects your spouse’s degree of attractiveness to you, etc.

Show your spouse you desire him/her physically.

Minimize bedroom boredom and routine by being creative, innovative, uninhibited and unashamed in mutually fulfilling ways. Avoid practices that are uncomfortable and/or a violation of you or your spouse’s conscience. Although increasingly popular and pushed by some as a viable solution to marital sexual enhancement, avoid the snare of using pornography or extra-marital fantasies to “improve” your sex life.

In Matthew 5:27, 28, Jesus states, You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart”

If you are thinking of or visualizing another woman/man while making love to your spouse, the marriage bed is spiritually defiled with adultery. 

When extra-marital fantasies enter the marriage bed, whether they originate from pornography or lustful thoughts about someone you came in contact with during the course of your day, such mental adultery brings defilement and sin which inevitably births death and not life in your sexual and marital relationship with your spouse.

Practicing the above will help to enhance the overall sexual health of your marriage and help to keep the sex alive and fulfilling, which in turn will help to protect your marriage against adultery.

The prevalence of marital infidelity is sad, disturbing, and extremely grievous to the Holy Spirit of God.

Fellow Christians/Believers in Christ/Kingdom Ambassadors/Saints, by the grace of God, let’s do all we can to protect our marriages and keep them away from the snare of adultery / extramarital affairs and encourage others to do the same all to the honor and glory of God.

Visit again for TIP #4

Peace & Blessings!

Kim

Copyright © 2012 by Kim, Author of “Unwalled” Blog, All rights reserved.

Image “Holding Hands” by xeodos4 courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net